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Bikerboy is a tortoise

He is alleged to have been paid millions by the Disaster Management Authority (DMA) after lying that his company could repair bridges damaged by storms.

He is also alleged to have been paid millions without completing some jobs. Muckraker will tell you here and now that there is no way Bikerboy could have pulled off such a clever heist.

Not that Bikerboy is incapable of thieving.

Yes, he could make a goat or chicken disappear.

Yes, he could make clothes fly off a washing line.

But that is about the type of crimes he can pull off.

There is no way he could have rigged tenders and then tricked his way to getting paid millions. Those who know Bikerboy will tell you that he is a simple Mosotho man who just happened to own a nice motorbike.

They will also confirm that he is just a simple man incapable of stealing millions from an institution like the DMA.

If you think Muckraker is lying just walk up to him and ask what is 2+7+8+9. He will count his fingers and take off his shoes to count his toes. If that is not enough, he will ask you to take off your shoes so he can count until he gets the answer.

Give him another ’metse with a plus and a minus, and his head will be spinning. Don’t try any multiplication or division ’metse on him because he will go mental.

Muckraker is not insulting Bikerboy but merely describing him. It is what it is. He is what he is. A creature of God.

This is to illustrate that Bikerboy is someone’s tortoise on a tree.

Muckraker will strip naked and walk from Ha Foso to Roma if it is proven that Bikerboy is a tortoise without an owner.

Until then, she hopes his owners paid him fairly for his troubles.

May thunder strike them if they paid him a pittance and then allowed him to hang dry while they munch their fat share of the stake from the DMA.

His ancestors are watching as their son is being roasted for the sins of others who think they are clever.

It’s a pity he won’t be riding his bike out of this fire.

Nka! Ichuuuuuuuuuuuu

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